Welcome

Welcome, welcome, welcome! Hey, there! *waves*

So, in case you're wondering who the hell is me, i give you some clues: big (not as big as you think), (sometimes) awkward, glasses, 5 ft 5 in, nerdy, chubby? em.. but still as attractive as Jennifer Lawrence (couldn't help myself, sorry :p)

Enough? No?
Okay.

"Hello class, may I introduce myself? My name is Rafifa Kamila, I live in *censored*, I study in SMPIT Thariq Bin Ziyad, I love to read books and watch movies, I wanna be a filmmaker. And I'll bring some oscars someday."

That was literally what i said to my English teacher and my classmates. And they laughed. They were never expected me to say the last sentence. Because (they think) i am a quite girl. Yes, i am. I don't like wasting words, it's just not my style. 

But don't get me wrong. I'm a teenager too. I like discover something new, I like chattering about many things with my friends. Just between you and me, okay? Boys are ones of interesting topics for us. Psst.

Then, why do people think (or perhaps i just think they do) i look so shy, mysterious, and even boring? 

The answer depends on who you ask. If you ask my teachers, my friends, you're gonna get the same answer. Because they don't know me. They only judge a book by the cover. If you ask my brother, my parents, my family, my close friends, you're gonna get big NO. And then they would probably say, "If only you really know her, she isn't like that." I'm louder around certain people.

I don't talk much because, first, I don't find anything to talk about; second, I find something to talk about, but there is no one to talk to; third, I do find someone, but as i've mentioned before, i'd rather step back whether the situation goes awkward. 

And the top reason is, too much thoughts in my head. I had a little trouble in expressing my feeling to everyone. Wrote down it and arranged words are easier way for me.

Found this gif from here

I wish the beautiful words that you read above was made by me, but it wasn't. It's from the talented John Green and quoted from one of the lines from his book, The Fault in Our Stars.

Random thoughts always cross my mind wherever and whenever i am. Those could be about lovely book quotes, upcoming movies, strangers i saw on the roads, the school that made me stressed out, family, friends, even the annoying acnes. It could be anything. 

I wanna tell you more about myself, but it would be very long long long story.. This is not intended to be an essay or autobiography. I make it short. 15 things i like in my life:

- My family with all their big hearts. 

- Good books, with memorable characters and quotes, and unforgettable ending.

- I hardly touched by a movie. Although there were many good movies i've watched, the impressive ones are not easy to find.

- True friends who stab my heart (it rarely happened, though) and cheer me up in front of my face. 

- Internet. Imagine your homework would be without it.

- Beach, sand, ocean.. ahh

- Sunrise and sunset

- Adventures

- Great scenery such as the colorful rainbow

- Song

- Food! (I almost forget it. What a shame!)

- Sherlock Holmes, especially the tv series from BBC (I'm sherlocked and cumberbatched!!)

- 15 is my favorite number.

- The last but not least, I'm proud being a muslimah and wear my hijab everywhere. I supposed I might be lost in this dynamic era, when the difference between truth and falsehood getting difficult to be recognized, without the warm light that was brought by The Prophet Muhammad to this mad world. I feel blessed more and more everyday. Alhamdulillah.

Now you know more about myself, right? And I'll post more things later. I'd like to share them, my life, my thoughts, my experiences with you, yes you. If i post something, that's because i can't contain it any longer in my head. I hope you enjoy reading them. And don't forget to leave comments. I wanna make sure i wasn't wasting my time wrote things with nobody read it. It would be sucks, seriously. 

We can discuss everything, you know. Let me know you! 

Nb: I'm not a professional writer. If you find those words are weird, displease, or not make sense (is it? i've tried my best.), please forgive me.

Many loves and thanks,

Rafifa